ရှင်သန်ခြင်းနဲ့ ဆုံးရူံးမှု
When the question of how to cope with loss arises, it is far easier to offer words of comfort to a friend than to bear the weight of that sorrow yourself. After all, only through personal experience do we truly understand.
I knew it was coming and thought I was well-prepared for it, both mentally and physically. But when I heard it spoken aloud, everything I had cherished and owned was gone, it felt like being hit by an enormous crashing wave, leaving me gasping for air. No, I do not think it was sadness that overwhelmed me, but a deep emptiness that filled every corner of my being. I couldn’t help but stare into the void, unable to fully grasp the extent of the loss.
Though my own loss seemed so insignificant compared to the devastation others had faced through out this country, homes looted, lives shattered. Still, my heart clenched. Amid my lost belongings, it was my external hard drive, holding snapshots of precious moments that I could never recreate and important data, weighed heaviest on my heart.
In Buddhism, there’s a belief that having possessions taken from you is a karmic debt from a previous life. Since I am not a Buddhist, I can't subscribe to or validate that philosophy but the idea of past actions reverberating into the present adds a complexity to my grief, and makes it harder for my mind to comprehend.
I recalled a conversation with my dear friend Mikey months earlier. He had spoken of losing his phone, full of priceless photos, videos, and a journal of feelings and poems, all consumed by fire. It was hard for him to accept the void left behind. I had told him then that loss is simply a part of living. Now, as I sit with my own sorrow, I remind myself of those same words. Loss is part of living.
As I move forward, in this dance between loss and life, I must learn to embrace the loss and find peace within it.